| Release Date
|| October 19, 2012
|| 43 minutes
| Previous Episode
|| Episode 1
| Intro Music
- Pete skipped his wife's friend's annual 4th of July part on Lake Erie, missed a shirtless Rob "The Gronk" Gronkowski, hammock sleeping
- Pete asks Sebastian about the prospects of his father selling his sperm to breed more comedians with his talent level
- Live clip from Pete's show regarding ass-grabbing
- Sebastian tells the story of visiting his Lana's family in North Carolina; preparing to ask the family for her hand in marriage and requisite shedding of tears
- "This is gonna get emotional" crying interlude by DJ Lou
- Russians have moved in next door to Pete's "porn den"; bringing with them a pet rabbit, outdoor couch, blankets and kitty litter on the roof.
- A discussion of aversion to jumping another's car, Sebastian's concerns about contagious car problems.
- Pete tests out Sebastian's acting chops on a barber monologue cold read.
- Don't call Sebastian's Dad a barber, he's a hairstylist.
- Sebastian is getting friendly with John Legend, attends a pool party and brings a bottle of Grey Goose, unaware Legend is sponsored by the vodka and gets free product
- Pete tells a story about partying with John Mayer and committing a social faux-pas.
Quotes from the episode
- Sebastian: "And now the tears start coming..." Pete: "From you? Unbelievable."
- Pete: "You've been meaning to talk to her all week, but you've been too busy sleeping with her daughter downstairs to come upstairs and ask if you could marry her...too."
- Pete: "I am most likely making love to my wife in the same room that Ron Jeremy banged chicks in."
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